Perhaps they will help you too. Trying to be someone else. Someone who fits in. Less needy. Less flawed. Less YOU. You wanted them to like you. You wanted to make a good impression. You wanted to be seen as worthy and loveable. So you could feel healed and whole. And so for the longest time, behind a facade of fake smiles, you have inadvertently betrayed yourself for the purpose of pleasing everyone else. And more than that, you now realize no matter what you do or how you change, some people will never be pleased anyway.
Not because other people approve of you, but because you are breathing your own air, thinking your own thoughts, and occupying a space no one else ever could. Yes, you are indeed worthy! Your ideas are worthy. Your feelings are worthy. Your needs are worthy. Even if it makes people turn their heads. Even if it means walking alone down the path less traveled for awhile.
The real battle is always in your mind. And your mind is under your control, not the other way around. You may have been broken down by adversity or rejection or stress, but YOU are not broken. Choose to take up a lot of positive space in your own life today.
Choose to give yourself permission to meet your own needs. Choose to honor your feelings and emotions.
1. Practice thinking better about yourself.
Choose to make self-love and self-care a part of your daily rituals…. Choose to think better about yourself , so you can live better in spite of yourself. We all have this picture in our minds of ourselves — this idea of what kind of person we are. When this idea gets even slightly harmed or threatened, we tend to react defensively and irrationally.
People may question whether we did a good job, and this threatens our idea of being a competent person, so we become angry or hurt by the criticism. And the list goes on. But the craziest thing is, oftentimes we are actually the ones harming and threatening ourselves with negativity and false-accusations…. I felt like a slacker. Yes, starting over and making substantial changes in your life is almost always feasible. The truth is, no one wins a game of chess by only moving forward; sometimes you have to move backward to put yourself in a position to win.
- The Death of the Orange Trees.
- 6 Strategies for Getting Unstuck and Creating a Life You Love.
- Praising the Rain!
- Barnstorming (Gail McCarthy Mystery Book 12).
And this is a perfect metaphor for life. Life gradually teaches us that U-turns are allowed. So turn around when you must! And there are three little words that can release you from your past mistakes and regrets, and get you back on track. Something small.
7 Steps To Help You Move Forward Confidently | HuffPost Life
If you mess it up, start over. Try something else. Change is never easy — you fight to hold on and you fight to let go. But letting go is generally the healthiest path forward. It clears out toxic thoughts and choices from the past and paves the way to make the most positive use of the present. Eventually, most of us end up settling in some part of our life.
We let go of certain ideals and dreams, we compromise, and we make trade-offs. But if we pay close attention, we also learn that we can make the best of every outcome , and still get a lot of what we want in life, if we manage our time, energy and attitude appropriately. When should you settle, or compromise, and when should you continue fighting hard for what you ideally want to achieve?
There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, but when you encounter a situation that forces you to choose between compromise and fighting forward against the opposition, it might help to also ask yourself:. Being able to distinguish needs from wants is essential in every walk of life. Never let go of an outcome you truly need in your life, but be reasonably flexible on the outcomes you want but could live fine without.
So focus on what really matters and let go of what does not. But for everything else, let go a little. Loosen your grip, compromise… settle. Settle on less of the unessential, to get more of what you really need and want in life. Eating a spinach and kale salad brings discomfort too. Of course, these are just examples, because different people find discomfort in different things, but you get the general idea. The key thing to understand is that most forms of discomfort actually help us grow into our strongest and smartest selves. And now we run from it constantly.
The problem with this is that, by running from discomfort, we are constrained to partake in only the activities and opportunities within our comfort zones. Amazingly, the simple act of accepting a little discomfort every day, and taking it one small step at a time, can solve most of our common problems, and make our minds happier, healthier and stronger in the long run. There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them.
This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become. So when you find yourself cocooned in isolation and cannot find your way out of the darkness, remember that this is similar to the place where caterpillars go to grow their wings. You just got to get there. Goals are important. All journeys of change must begin with a goal. And you also must have determination in order to achieve your goals.
However, what do you think happens when you are too determined, or too obsessed with a goal? You begin to nurture another belief: who you are right now is not good enough. Years ago, I had become overly obsessive in my efforts to meditate. My over-the-top efforts to meditate for extensive periods of time had opened the doors to lots of self-criticism and stress.
Thankfully, however, I realized that my obsession toward meditation had made me forget one of the basic objectives of meditation — self-acceptance. So the bottom line is this: you have to accept yourself as you are, and then commit to personal growth. The key is to remind yourself that you already are good enough; you just need more practice.
Mindfulness as a daily ritual is the ultimate challenge and practice. Ritualize this kind of mindfulness into your daily routines, and you will undoubtedly change the way you spend the rest of your life. Gratitude is the foundation. And happiness is simply the sacred experience of living with a genuinely grateful heart.
Expressing gratitude is so simple though, right? How could it possibly make that big of a difference? Yes, being grateful seems simple enough, but a grateful state of mind is unbelievably hard to maintain when life disappoints us. Being grateful starts with being present. In the present moment, our real situation is rarely as convoluted as we make it out to be. And we can meet this moment with grace and gratitude, if we can truly stay in the present.
When our mind drifts into the past or speculates about the future, we must do our best to catch ourselves, and then refocus mindfully back on the present. Our reality can ruin us if we deny it and fight it … or we can accept it for what it is, be grateful for it, and gradually make the best of it. This takes practice, of course, because gratitude tends to escape us when we feel let down. But this is the real world, not an ideal world. And your reality always contains a silver lining of beauty, if you choose to see it.
Instead of focusing on how arduous everything is, we have ritualized the practice of gratitude into our lives, and we use our gratitude rituals to find glimmers of hope and joy in the small steps of progress we make every day. So whenever I catch myself lingering at the center in an adverse state of mind, I do my best to briefly shift my focus, away from my own issues, and onto other people around me that I might be able to help. The central question now is about what others need.
So whenever you feel a bit lost or stuck with your own issues, try to shift your focus from your circumstances to the circumstances of those around you. The perspective you gain from doing so will guide you forward. Angel and I initially developed this strategy in our lives over a decade ago as we were struggling with the near simultaneous loss of two loved ones.
But we took one small step every day — oftentimes just writing a short blog post to share some lessons learned with others who might find our stories and insights helpful — and it felt good, and we gradually got stronger. This morning, as I caught myself struggling with some inner conflicts, I followed suit again — I took a small step forward… just turning on my laptop, opening up a new document, and writing a single sentence. Such an action is so small as to seem insignificant, and yet so easy as to be possible when I was feeling down.
8 Proven Tips for Moving Forward in Your Life
And it showed me the next step was possible, and the next. What else would you add to the list? Leave a comment below and share your thoughts. The first two points of this post really rocked my world today. Doing so brings healthy perspective to my otherwise unhealthy, momentary mind-funk. Everyone gets into a funk sometimes! Even those really successful people who might initially look like they have it all.
However, there are ways to tap into your hope and overcome the obstacles that make you feel most stuck. So, whatever your goal, try these six tips that can move forward with your life. Change your attitude by changing your state. This is a popular personal development technique for a good reason, and it can take all sorts of different forms. In addition, reach out to people who make you feel good and who know your true self. Sometimes, just talking to them will be enough to shake you out of your funk.
If your current funk was partly triggered by the negativity of others or by people telling you how you should behave , turn your full attention to your mission in life and to your vision of what your realized dream will look like. Get in tune with the sense of trust you have in yourself, e. And this is what is holding you back from truly moving forward. You need to realize that your past is exactly that, the past. Because, firstly, it is pretty much impossible, and, secondly, the past has still taught you some valuable lessons.
What you need to do is to let go of the negative emotions and limiting beliefs, so that they lose power over your future. Small steps take you on long journeys. Break your biggest, unpleasant task down into lots of little sub-tasks and do at least one of them today. And if one of the broken down tasks looks too big, break that down as well! It is important to find out what one big thing is holding you back. Got it? There you go.